Slow Mo Don’t Work for This Mo

Consider this a notice to all the directors of the world. That’s right Zack Snyder and James cameron, I’m callin’ you out on your shit! Now if only I could find a way to make Zack Snyder or James Cameron read my blog… but that’s beside the point! This could even serve to help novice film makers. Yeah, I like phrasing it that way because it makes me sound like I’m actually providing a measurable service to the world instead of hiding behind the anonymity of the internet and bitching…

Anyways, we need to talk about this slow motion business. I get it, it looks cool and it allows you to draw attention to all the details that you and your team put effort into creating this world. I totally get that. Hell, if I was even halfway decent at making films, I’m sure I’d want to do the same. But the fact of the matter is I suck at making them, so I’m gonna take this time to concentrate on others (Once again, don’t I sound like a humanitarian or something instead of a deeply unhappy 20-something?).

This whole slow motion business, let’s be honest, it’s a one trick pony. Then again, coming from Zack Snyder (What’s that? Somebody already made this? Well, I can take it and do it again… I mean, if ya want) and James Cameron (Dude, we get it, aliens are awesome and the human race sucks, it’s like the theme of every one of your movies), one trick pony is pretty much the name of the game. This isn’t to say that I haven’t enjoyed some of their films. I mean, let’s put the emphasis on some, but the 2004 Dawn of the Dead was at least enjoyable. Maybe not as socially relevant as Romero’s original, but ya know, it was fun. Now for James Cameron, we’re gonna go back a little while to 1994 with True Lies because that’s the last movie I’ve actually enjoyed of his, but I digress.

I get it, every film maker is flawed (so maybe some of us wanna stop acting like God, eh James?) but with this slow motion business, it’s just ridiculous. I mean, if you look at 300 the damn movie wouldn’t have been longer than 20 minutes if you cut out all of the slow motion. As for Avatar, which admittedly brought this rant on, I had no idea why slow motion was being used in half the parts that it was. It just didn’t make sense. Now what a lot of film makers seem to be doing is this whole practice of “slow motion to heighten tension”. It might work for some, but honestly, it does nothing for me. Maybe both of these movies just don’t really resonate with me but the truth is, although Snyder and Cameron are the main perpetrators, it’s been a while since I’ve seen slow motion used well, without it being for comic effect. It can work, but I’m just sayin’, why don’t we try something new for a little, okay fellas?

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