I Want a Guy Like Cary Grant

I know it’s not something we talk about a lot. Well, I guess I really mean “me”… yeah, the whole “let’s not talk about gay things” is really my bag of crazy. But with the bitterness and yes, regret, of Valentine’s Day still fresh in my mind, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. See, I’m the kinda guy who always finds himself with too much time on his hands. Yes, living in a studio, with no job, and class only twice a week leaves one with some time on his hands. It’s shocking, right? But still, it’s not just the time that’s becoming a problem as the bitterness, and yes, even shame of Valentine’s Day settles in.

So I’ve decided to put myself out there. I am now looking for the perfect guy. Well, maybe not perfect… hell, I’m not even perfect. Once again, shocking, but true. So back to where I started, even if I found a perfect guy, I’m starting to worry if I’d even recognize him. See, I have this thing where I’ve been spoiled. Whether I want to admit or not, the days of Holiday and His Girl friday are behind us.

But thanks to DVDs and VHSs that I’ve all but worn out, I’ll always have Johnny Case and Walter Burns to help me through the good times and the bad. There’s something so refreshing about the gentlemanly charms and debonair good looks that has found a way into my heart after all these years. I mean, sure it could be just the flashy smile or those piercing eyes, but I’m better than that, right? I know I have my shallow moments, but this 17 year relationship has to be based on more than just physical attraction, doesn’t there?

The real issue here is not what it is about Cary Grant. As much as I wish it was, this is more about the question I can’t get it out of my mind. Where did all the Cary Grants of the world go? Okay, yes, maybe it’s not fair to compare real-life men to such classic movie characters, but what’s that they always say? Life isn’t fair.

So if anybody knows where I can find an old-fashioned, charming witty guy? Well, let’s just say, I’m taking suggestions.

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